11 Feb, 2023

Pete Cohen  00:00

Happy, beautiful, amazing day. It is Pete Cohen, it is the Future Self podcast. Today's episode is called, The Courage to Speak Out - How to Find Your Voice. If you are the sort of person who has a message, you have something you want to share with the world, then this podcast is going to help you really understand what you need to do, how to build that courage to speak out, to have the confidence to say what you really need to say. So you can impact the world. And one of the reasons we're doing this is right now we are helping people all over the world master their message, we've created a community of people that really are working on using their voice and developing the skills to help them get really good at sharing what they have, you'll see in the show notes, you can join our community, we have a free Facebook group, where we're giving lots and lots of value to people, I don't think there's ever been a time in human history where there are as many people who are speaking out, got something to say they've got a podcast, they've got a YouTube channel, they got an Instagram account, they got stories going left, right and center. And all this is great because we can put content out into the world. But unless we really do some basics, and really get good at mastering our message so we can really impart what we have in a way that really encourages people to look at who we are and what we have, then this is what we have created. And we would love you to join our community, check out the show notes, you'll see the link you can get involved with what we have. But this podcast really is for you. It's for anyone who really has something to say. So straight after the theme, June, we're gonna dive straight into the presentation, I'll see you after the theme tune

Pete Cohen  02:29

Things that are expecting some the courage to speak out how to find your voice. So let me ask you, what do you think, is one of the biggest fears in the Western world? Maybe the whole world? Well, it probably won't surprise you that one of the biggest fears in the western world is public speaking. Many surveys have shown that public speaking can often be in the top five of the biggest fears that people have, it can actually be higher than death, which is quite scary to me that some people perhaps would rather die than actually speak in public. But let's just take a moment and think about what what is the reason for that? Why would people be so frightened of speaking in public? Maybe you've had a time in your life where you've been up in front of people and you had to speak, maybe in a meeting at work and it was coming around to you and you had to say your piece? Or maybe you had to get up in front of people and deliver some sort of presentation or message. Why does that fear rise? Is it possible that it's because people don't want to be seen? Is it possible that people want to hide their vulnerabilities? Is it because people are scared of being judged? or ridiculed or laughed? That? Is it that people just don't want to be the center of attention? is so fascinating that so many people want to say something, but they're frightened. So how do we overcome that fear and have the courage to speak out and find our voice? Well, it probably won't surprise you that it does revolve around courage. But what is courage, but you can go to the dictionary and you can see that the word courage means the quality of being brave. Having a firm determination to do something. And when in your life have you had courage when in your life if you literally did something perhaps that you didn't give yourself a choice. You just made the choice to do something that was difficult and challenging. And when you Think of courage. What do you think of? for me? When I think of courage? The first thing I think of is the lion in the Wizard of Oz. Why? Well, I just remember, the Tin Man didn't have a heart and the Scarecrow didn't have a brain. Dorothy was lost and wanted to find our way home. And the lion didn't have courage. Which is kind of interesting, really, because the word courage in its origin means the heart, having the heart to do something, having the heart to go on an epic adventure, which they did, they went down the yellow brick road. And he didn't realize that all he needed was someone to give him a certificate for him to realize that he actually had courage. And when we look at that quality and people well, really, what is the key to a great life? Where does courage come into play? We love to watch characters who do courageous things. This is why we love to watch films. When Luke Skywalker, Skywalker decided to leave the planet that he was on and step into the unknown, and choose the force. We saw courage. When Neo was offered the pills in the matrix, which one do you want? He took the courageous step. When Frodo decided to leave the Shire, in Lord of the Rings in that line, where they come to a field and his friend Sam says to him, Mr. Frodo, we've never been past this point before. Frodo didn't say you're right, Sam, let's go home. No, they stepped into the unknown. It's called the hero's journey. And we love these films, because we see these characters do something courageous. But is it possible that we identify with those characters? Now, of course, they're made up, they're not real. But when we look at other people in history, have done courageous things. People like Rosa Parks, the mother of the modern Civil day movement, civil rights movement. When we look at Nelson Mandela, when we look at Oscar Schindler, Martin Luther King, people who have the courage to speak out, did they do what they do in the absence of fear? Or did they do it using the fear? They found their voice because they stepped into the unknown. I watched a speech the other day of Nelson Mandela giving a speech in Parliament. And you could see people there quite clearly hated him. And you could feel that energy just watching it. But his message was far more important than his fear. Oscar Schindler was actually in the Nazi Party. And it would have been so easy for him to do what everyone else was doing. But he had the courage to do what so few would do. And if you actually stopped in your life right now, and you look back, and you'd realize, what are some of the things that you've done? That were courageous acts? There's a great TED talk with a lady called Cindy Solomon, she's a leadership expert. And she talks about how only one in three people actually think of themselves as courageous. Which is kind of crazy, because I think we're all courageous. It's just whether we want to see ourselves in that light. So are you ready to find your voice like never before? Are you ready to tap into that infinite courage that I think every single one of us has? In order for us to change, then we have to wake up, we have to stop and look, and maybe even question what is the world actually asking me to do? Do you have a message? You see, our desire to fit in our desire to conform? Really is where most people are at. Why do we not want to be seen? Why do we want to hide our vulnerabilities? Why are we scared of being judged, ridiculed and laughed that? Why were we pack animals? We are creatures that survive in groups. And if you thought you were going to be ridiculed or rejected, that would be assigned to double down and make sure that you conform, make sure you fit in to who society says you should be. It's just fascinating to see that when people really do rise up. They often rise up when enough is enough. When the straw that breaks the camel's back. When a crisis happens, we see people behave in a way that we wouldn't normally behave. But what tends to happen is people then revert back to who they were before. The courage to speak out, really revolves around, what is it that you want to say? And who it is that you actually want to become? How do you find your voice really is to stop? And listen. Because we all know that we all talk to ourselves, they say, whoever they are, that the first sign of madness is talking to yourself. So if that was the case, then a lot of people have got a problem. But it's the quality of what we're saying to ourselves, and who is it that's actually speaking to us? Is it possible that there is a part of you that just wants to protect you, it doesn't want you to stand out, it doesn't want you to be rejected. It wants you to fit in. I was talking to someone the other day about sheep, and how sheep are very much like humans, sheep hang out and herds and they follow each other, and they go where everyone else is gone. But then some people go, whoa, whoa, whoa, where are we going? So you when you stop and listen, you can hear that voice, the voice that maybe is trying to protect you, and doesn't want you to hurt doesn't want you to be frightened. But is there another voice? Is there another part of you that maybe it's time to have the courage to listen to? Is he in a world that's moving so fast, it's very hard for people to just stop and take a few minutes just to listen. Studies have shown that people would actually prefer to have an electric shock, rather than just being on their own with their own thoughts. And it's only when we stop that we can look at life with a fresh pair of eyes. If we don't stop then we continue to live life in the way that we've always lived it and then we wonder why we always get what we've always got in Robert Greene's book mastery. He talks about at your birth, there is a seed that is planted and that seed is your uniqueness. It's your own leanness, and it wants to grow, it wants to transform itself. It wants to flower.

Pete Cohen  12:29

It wants to reach its full potential. It has a natural, assertive energy. And he says your life's task is to bring that seed to life, to express your uniqueness through your work. You have a destiny to fulfill. And the stronger you feel it and maintain it as a force, the easier it is for you to activate it. That's what Robert Greene says. And I agree with him. What about you? See, there's a part of every human being that I don't think we always listen to. In fact, the Romans actually had a name for this. They called it the genius. And when you think of a genius, who do you think of? Most people would think of a Mozart or a Cristiano Ronaldo, Leonardo da Vinci. But if you really look at the origin of that word, it means the moral authority, the moral authority, the voice within you, they believe that every person was born with a genius inside them. It's just who we listening to? Is it possible that we live in a world that for generations, people have never been encouraged to listen to that voice rather than to conform to someone else's voice? So if there was a call, and you were being called to something, what is it, you're being called to? That battle that maybe you had this morning to get out of bed? Who one the part of you that wanted you to stay where you are the part of you that wanted you to just do what you did yesterday? versus the other part that said, Come on, let's get up. Let's go. That there was something to look forward to. There was something to do see the courage to speak out and find your voice is to acknowledge there is a voice and to give that voice, more attention. In fact, you could think of me right now as a lawyer who has come from that future self has come from your genius and said, listen up. There's someone who wants to talk to you. It's your future self. It's just a question of whether you want to answer the door. So when we look at courage, and what courage really is, Courage isn't about doing something in the absence of fear. Courage is about doing something in the presence of fear. What's the greatest thing you will ever do? Maybe is to speak out, speak up, and move through fear, to realize that who you word isn't who you have to be. And this all came to the fore for me many years ago, where I saw someone behave in the most courageous way. And it wasn't me. It was my partner, who is now my wife. When she was diagnosed with a brain tumor, and given 18 months to live, it took time for her to find something in herself, to rise up and decide to fight and move through some very challenging times. And I fell in love with her throughout how I saw her rise up to, through seeing a part of her that refused to accept what she had been told. And that inspired me like never before to show other people how they could be courageous in their life. And of course, history sometimes can repeat itself. And last year, once again, I saw her behave in the most courageous way. The condition that she had returned, and this time it was much more aggressive. And I saw the life in someone literally get drained away, not being able to get out of bed, being frightened of seizures, and just literally being lost. Seeing doom and gloom. But once again, that courage rose up in her and she found her voice because sometimes finding your voice isn't actually what you say. It's the voice inside your head that says, Okay, let's go for this. Let's do this. Human beings are work in progress, who mistakenly think they are complete. The story of our life hasn't ended, and the story of our life can continue. The question is, are you ready to answer the call? Are you ready to become one of the one in three people? That is courageous, and maybe you already are. But maybe it's time now to see courage with a fresh pair of eyes to see every single day, the opportunities that we have to do courageous things. When we look at ancient wisdom, modern science, psychology, and we look at where is the middle ground? Where does everyone agree in what makes a great human being? It's the virtues, the cardinal virtues and that doesn't mean that they come down from a religious order. CS Lewis talks about the word Cardinal coming from the word Cardo, which means pivotal hinge. The door to a good life is hinged on these virtues. And what are those virtues, justice, standing up for the rights of others and yourself, or wisdom, the wisdom that has been passed on to you the wisdom of your own experience, self control, temperance, your ability to control what you do, and courage. Courage for me is at the heart of all other virtues courage, breathes life into them. We all have the ability to get up and stand up and stand up for our rights

Pete Cohen  19:36

stand up. Stand up before your right stand up for your rights. Stand up. And I wonder just how many people have been empowered by this song? by Bob Marley

Pete Cohen  20:02

because if you really want something in life, and you want something to be different to what it currently is, there's going to be resistance, you're going to have to get up, you're going to have to stand up, there's going to be a fight.

20:19

Now you see the light,

Pete Cohen  20:21

because if you're in a place of darkness, you can light a match

Pete Cohen  20:36

and that's what so many people do. Because when things are difficult, it's just so easy to let go. It's so easy to let that courage go. So what I'd like you to know is that your voice matters. Your voice makes a difference. What do I want you to do? I want you to do something courageous right now and answer the call.

Pete Cohen  21:49

The phones phone's ringing. It's time to have the courage to answer that call. Whatever that call is, what are you being called to do? And every day recognize that courage is like a muscle. And there are so many courageous acts that you could do today. The courage to step up step out the courage to exercise the courage to say some to say someone you love them the courage to pick up the phone, the courage to go the extra mile, the courage to be courageous, the courage to speak out and find your voice. In fact, you don't even need to find it. It's right there. Thank you so much for listening to the podcast. Now if you want to join our public speaking community so you can really master your message become really good at presenting what you have to the world and come join our free community. You'll see the link in the show notes we would love to help you and support you just do what you need to do so you can have greater impact and greater success. Come join. Thanks for listening and we will see you soon. All the best and happy beautiful day.