28 Mar, 20235 Simple Ways to a Better Future
“Live life as if you were living a second time and as though you had acted wrongly the first time.” – Viktor Frankl
We all want a better future, but is it possible to live a happier, more successful, and more fulfilling life in this pandemic-laden world?
The world that we live in today presents us with numerous difficult challenges and most of the time the future seems bleak. However, you must never lose hope, because there are ways by which you can have a better future.
Listen in as I unravel five simple ways to the extraordinary life you have been dreaming of.
You do not have to live a default future. You have a choice. You can be someone better.
⚡️ There is more to us than our insecurities and imperfections.
⚡️ How we decide to move through the world affects who we become.
⚡️ Integrity with your work and with yourself is loving what you are doing and doing it even if it is difficult.
⚡️ Anything is possible when you put yourself in an environment that supports your growth.
🔥 To have a better future:
- Stop and look at where you are.
- Build a compelling relationship with your future self.
- Commit 1% of your day.
- Love the challenge of improving yourself.
- Go public.
🎯 1:53 Predictions for 2023 and life-changing events
🎯 11:19 The default future
🎯 13:34 How man has evolved.
🎯 17:59 Hal Hershfield talks about his future self.
🎯 22:36 Love is the answer.
Send us a message and tell us what is your biggest takeaway about this episode. 👇🏼👇🏼👇🏼
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- write letters to your future self to help you form that much-needed relationship with the person you are becoming
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About Pete Cohen: Pete Cohen is one of the world’s leading life coaches and keynote speakers. Hundreds of thousands of people from all over the world have been motivated and inspired by Pete’s presentations. He has professionally impacted the lives of thousands of people worldwide, including business executives, professional athletes, and everyday people. Pete focuses on the importance of closing the gap in our lives between where we are and where we want to be, both personally and professionally.
It’s then all about coaching you to remove the obstacles that are in your way and helping you install the habits of success.
Pete is the author of 20 published books, several of which have been best-sellers across the world, including Shut the Duck Up, Habit Busting, Life DIY, and Sort Your Life Out. He has also presented his own show on TV called The Coach and was the resident Life Coach on GMTV for 12 years.
Pete Cohen 0:01
Happy Beautiful day is the Future Self Podcast. Today's podcast is called 5 Simple Ways to a Better Future. I'll see you after the theme tune
Are you ready to shine bright like a diamond? I love diamonds, I'm sure many people know how diamonds are actually formed. You know diamonds are obviously formed by pressure, something amazing happens in the earth and then through that pressure, something incredible comes out and oh yes, of course. Why am I saying what I'm saying right now. Because ultimately who we become, I think is a direct result of a few things. But one of them is how we decide to move through the world. And I'm sure I'm not the first person to say this that our greatest tests can often be our greatest testimonials and in the podcast that our talk about five simple ways to a better future. But before we talk about the future, why don't we just talk about where we are right now. Now we are in 2022 soon to be 2023. And how's 2023 Go look? Well, there's three predictions. One is a global recession, but some people would say we were already in. Here in the UK, we've definitely had a few life changing events, Brexit knockdowns of all this are going on right now that household prices are going through the roof interest rates, there's going to be job losses. It's going to be really challenging. I don't know how many of you people also think I saw that we've been pretty well in Macedonia at Cyprus and Australia and South Africa. And we realized that there's more more people listen to this podcast because I think more people are waking up to wanting to see the future a different way. We know that 23 Three, we know that you are finally going to be delivering a climate climate plan to reduce emissions caused by global companies. We know that 10% of reading classes will be able to connect to the internet 80% of the people on earth will have a digital presence. 90% of people will have a supercomputer in their pockets. Next year. We're gonna see the modification of genes to renew the body like never before we're gonna see some massive massive changes. But what else are we gonna see, I think we're gonna see a lot more physical health issues, or mental health issues. That's how I That's how I see it. You know, I'd be foolish if I didn't see it any other way. But I also think that the future is going to see two types of people I want to ask you which one of these people do you want to be versus which one is going to be? I think that moving forwards we're gonna see more and more people that are just kind of disconnected from their point of own inner world and they're totally affected by the stimulation of the outside world. They are slaves and junkies to whatever you want to call it. Social media just they're being manipulated all the time. And I've often talked about this podcast that for a while when humans just mess the earth up so much that they have to leave the earth and go live on spaceships. And basically a robot comes to give these people different perspective of where they are because they forgot to use their legs and it's looking at screens and they're consuming food. I think we're gonna see more and more of those people, people who their attention has been sold to the highest bidder. If 90% of the world has a supercomputer in their pocket. What is that computer designed to do? Is it something I'm going to use or is it something that you're gonna be used by? And ultimately, we have to make a choice, we don't have to, the easiest thing is just to carry on doing what we're doing. So I think we're gonna see more and more people have kind of gone down that road and it's gonna be hard to bring them back to a world of their own self improvement of their better of them wanting to make a difference of wanting to contribute with wanting to just grow mentally, physically, emotionally, but I do think more or less people are gonna be the solution for the world that they're in, especially as many of the systems that are gonna break down. there got to be people out there that genuinely want to create legacy. And just see that their point of life is just about growing and getting better. If you're one of those people just say, alright, that's what I can do. Because I personally, this is how I view the world that there is there's there's a phone call, and then when you can hear it someone wants to talk to you you know who that person is dealing with that person is I don't know what you're gonna pick a call. But that phone call is actually gonna pick up the phone. Hello if you pick up the phone Okay, got that. Was your future self. That was the future because five simple ways to a better future. I think, first of all, let's just start with the fact the fact that we're going to have a very challenging time. There's no question about that. And we're going to be pushed and it's gonna be question right there already. But ultimately, we still have a choice and what do you want the legacy to be with the time that we're gonna go through? You've talked about the legacy of your life, what about the next in the next two or three years? Because I'm looking for the angles, brothers and sisters, who despite the challenges that we're facing, we get better? Because you probably heard this before, right? It's the same winds that blow the same way. Most of us are challenged by the same winds most of us, but it's Jim Rohn. once said, it's the setting of the sail. So I'd say to you, where are we going? Where are we going? If you don't know where you're going, it's we're gonna get lost. It's so easy to get lost. Right now. There's never been more information. There's never been people more people that are trying to get your attention. And I really want to thank you for listening to this podcast and being here right here right now. Because right now there's part of me that probably doesn't want this to this situation outside of where you are. Because as human beings, we are wanting creatures. So the first step you've got to start off with where we are. The first simple these are all very simple things. Not necessarily easy to do. They're simple five simple ways to a better life. Well, the first step is just stop it stop and look at where we are judging or criticize it or blame or shame this is it. This is where we are. And just be curious. That's really a superpower. Let's be curious as we just stop, just stop and be curious about how do we feel about where we are right now?
Pete Cohen 6:15
That's a simple question, but it's a challenging question sometimes to answer because that means you've got to go inside and we got to look at ourselves. And a lot of people don't want to do that. Because then we realize maybe some of our insecurities, imperfections, but the way I look at it is there's more to us than all of that. There's something inside all human beings that has allowed us to get to this point. I mean, how did you get to this point in your life? Sure. You
break some storms, right? But you're here maybe some of the greatest tests have been some of the brightest testimonials about you here. And I can tell you as someone who studied the human condition for as long as I have, I can tell you what got us here. In most cases, it's actually quite similar in terms of how we reacted to some very difficult circumstances that we faced. Now I don't know how much of that was conscious. Things happened that we found something in ourselves that we didn't know that was there we overcome. We overcame What was difficult I've seen these stories, all my life. I love those stories of how people overcame something, how they went from nothing to something, how they overcame something, totally change their life around.
Pete Cohen 7:01
I mean, these are the stories that inspire us like the hero's journey. We've done something heroic but what I'm asking all of us to do now is we want to do is stop getting that by chance, not waiting for prognosis or diagnosis. Let's go out and create some progress. Let's go out and create some put some processes in place. Let me just get better mentally, physically, emotionally. If that's you. I'm happy to have this conversation with you. Because some of this work isn't necessarily easy, but do you not think it'd be the greatest work of your life to become despite the challenges because what these challenges will bring is they'll give more more opportunity for people to go Oh, yeah, well, you know, what can I do about it? And some people will rise up and go, I'm not going to be defined by the circumstances, I'm still gonna have hope I'm still gonna have optimism. So the first step, first simple way is just start with where you are right now. Let's look at the life domains, right? What are the three life domains that most people are interested in improving? Right? So how many of you you're interested in improving your health and your you'd like more energy? How many if you'd like someone to do it for you just imagine if all you had to say is better health and more energy? I'd love a six pack. I'd love to have more mobility at my knees, whatever it is. I'd love that. Okay, what on a scale of one to 10 Where are you with that right now? Okay, this is about stopping and these are challenging questions to ask. I say I was about seven What about you? Now? Whatever the number is, here's the big question. Here's the big question. You ready? Before even the question, I'll tell you is why is that knowing what we know why we know why that number is lower? Because it's important. But how important is it? And one of the reasons it's not as important as it could be? There's a few reasons but I think probably the biggest reason for my experience is you're not listening to your future self. Because if you just I was probably calling you every day and saying hey, listen, please, please, please just look after yourself. Go for a walk, drink water. Right, your future self is is listening. But if you just have a lawyer present from the future self and saying, Listen, if you don't wake up and you don't stop changing, you're gonna have a default future. And again, when you stop, I might be wrong. But I think I'm right in my own world. And the people I speak to is that most people are living a default future and all that means they default futures. They know deep down, that what they're doing, is not going to serve them in the future. They know that they're creating the future they don't want maybe not everybody, but I think a lot of people do. And I think the reason we don't wake up to this is because it's difficult. It's the ease of remembering who we think we are versus the difficulty of imagining a future self. Imagining a person even as a person I want to be is seeing yourself in a different light. So on a scale of one to 10 What would you say? On a scale of one to 10 your relationships and your relationship with yourself without like, judging criticize it, you can blame me Seamus, give it a number. You know, what about your relationships and the people that matter most? For me, when I think about the relationship with my wife, and I give that number, there's only one thing that comes to mind. There's work to be done. There's something I can do to constantly improve that relationship and of course, they're just simple things that I do every single day. Because, you know, it's like a business. That's how I'm in the business of being married in order to keep a business going, keep a relationship going. There's certain things that I need to do. And this is just me and this is why we created a stock one stock one. This is why we created this app, this technology to really help people start investing in their future self because what will be the greatest thing you do? Well, maybe will be the person that you become one of the one on a scale of one to 10 with your with your business or your finances. Where are you with those? Is there something that you could do that if you did them every single day that would radically change your life? And I'm sure we can all say yes, whether we will do that work or not. This is why I truly believe the greatest work of my life will be what we do, who we become committed. Daily. And this is why we history and you'll get the help man has evolved and evolved to survive. A man has evolved to, to want to want we've got this wanting of people talking about this a lot around things. And I know for me, we've spoken about this before a podcast about dopamine. People think it is the pleasure molecule but really it's for wanting molecule. So most of us are just wanting things that you'd be thinking about something right now we listen to this podcast, and then all of a sudden you could think about something you just you can see something that would trigger you to want something maybe you've seen on Instagram or wherever you look, you look at something that looks interesting. I'll definitely do something a little bit more dopamine for you to go and look and obviously to buy the thing that you want. So that dopamine is that that turns off that pathway turns off, and then you go through your life until you want something else but what if you wanted to do your daily, daily whatever it was, you wanted to do your daily stops and starts because what I'm gonna say in a minute could completely change the way you look at this. Because my goal is to give you a different perspective of this. I'm not here to tell you what's right and wrong what you shouldn't shouldn't do, but tell them enough in your life. So the first simple way to a better life is just to stop and look at it. And where are the marginal gains? We're talking about 1% here Have you got? Could you dedicate 1% of your day, 14 minutes and 24 seconds to improving your life? Could you yes or no? Of course you can't believe? I don't know. And when we look back through history, what we also see is that man has an incredible ability or habit of starting and stopping
we stop and that's what we got to stop before we start that's why you quit stop one stop one because if you start to do something different and stop to look at what when you've done this in the past what's happened before to stop looking at what's working right now. Maybe what you need to move your life in a different direction. And of course I'm obsessed with this because you know, I am the people's coach. That's what I am. That's why I branded myself as the people's coach. So what does that mean? It means I'm a coach of people, every type of person. I want to be able to help them look at themselves differently think that I'm a coach, this is where you are what's working, what's not working, where you want to improve as a coach going from A to B as a coach us Where are we going or where is that place to go? Why do you want to go there? And who is the person that's there? Take a moment to think about this, right? This is step number two. This is a simple way. You've got to build a compelling relationship to your future self. You've got to you've got to listen to your future self talk to if you just ever ever doubt when you're talking to so anyway, but when you want to stop listening to that voice
Stay where you are, you voice we've all got that voice. We all know it. But unless you've got a compelling relationship to your future self and its approach, I had to do this. I worked this out a long time ago and I thought we can teach this because I was working with people to compete in a sport at the absolute highest level people that would be going out with billions of people be watching the Olympics in the firewall competing, we're working with a football team or working with an athlete. It's like okay, what do you want? Okay, well, how would you know you have how would you think you've won? It's pretty obvious, right? You know you want because you can see yourself having won. We know that person that you see that's not you.
Pete Cohen 12:54
Unless people see that person is somewhat separate to them. Honestly, I would actually say, Please don't bother. Obviously, you're wasting your time. And that's a bold statement to make, but I can make that statement. It's not just me that's making that statement. There's many people in the field of psychology of human behavior. This is how hershfield is probably one of the most well known authorities in the world around the future. So just take a listen to what he says.
It's very simple, but it's very challenging to the second simple way is to build a compelling relationship. You have to have empathy for your future. So this one should be teaching in schools I've often played on my podcast from my occupational psychologist who works with teenagers and she talks about how the trainers they have it they don't know the person they're gonna be in the future. So why why start creating waste? Why not? Why start building a future that is beyond the weekend? But that's what I'm obsessed with. Because to me, the future is now it's what I do right now. That's creating the future. That's what I'm obsessed about. But it's very easy to get into temptation. That's why you know, when we talk about this the Lord's prayer because not into temptation, Adam and Eve, don't eat fruit from the forbidden tree. There's this word in the first words that were written in Sanskrit word that means people when they start when they stop, that's what it means. Here. We're gonna begin. So these are simple ways. I'm not saying they're easy to do, but if you want to create a better future, you want someone to do it for you. Because that's the world of your soul is that someone's gonna do it for you, rather than none of that. No, no, no. Well, maybe some people can do some stuff for you. But what do you want to do? If you want to call out this better game? I reckon I'm one of the best people in the world to help you do that one, because I know other people to do it. I've studied with so many other great people in the world of personal development, psychology, I don't know what they're doing. However, what I decided to do, and I know it because of the results that we've gotten people. It's off the charts. It is off the flippin charts, people who have just decided to start carving out and building a better version of themselves by being relentless in starting and stopping behavior. You know, yesterday was a challenging day for me because on Saturday night, I just became much more aware of some hate in the world right now. I mean, there's always been hated teams, and what he's done with Arsenal, they just seem to hate that people have for each other. And I've seen people just pay me toxic people hate people because of their color, their religion, their their sex. I've seen it and I've just became much more aware of it the other day because I could see hatred towards a group of people that I have a very strong association to. I really got to I couldn't sleep. I was literally all night. I was I was processing it in the middle of the night. But how about that to the next day? The reality of doing something different?
You know, I just I just realized that love is the answer. And that's what I personally believe. But that doesn't have to be everyone everyone else isn't I saw a few people speaking on that. And it just changed everything.
Pete Cohen 15:39
I thought, well, how much love can I put into the world and that's the biggest step of all the things I'm saying this is probably the one that will challenge people the most. And I have to thank my colleague, Dr. Ray Sylvester, because we have conversations pretty much every morning before o'clock in the morning for me in 11 o'clock at night for him in the US. And we were talking about love, love being the answer. Because the first way, let's just stop it. And nothing should be stopping looking where we're at every day. Just that's why we have a journal as a part of our what we've created a journal that allows people to chart the course. I think journaling is absolutely essential if you don't learn. If you don't chart the course you know this journey is worth doing. It has to be worth recording. So we have generalists are the ones that you also have the ability to write a letter to your future self as you build a strong connection to your future self. But I can tell you this is what I truly have worked out a big epiphany about this over the last couple of days is love. Love what is love does love comparable. I think love is a choice. Love is an energy. I think it's a frequency that you put yourself in where you can feel love. If you think about someone you love when I think about my nieces or think about my wife or I think about many people I work with I'd love for them to feel a vibration inside me right now. It's a force that it can overcome everything and many years ago, when I first started to change my relationship to the future. When my wife wasn't invited to join the future. I met Patti dealt with it and we started working together we start coaching each other and never forget what she said to me one day she said you got to make a choice level three, which one you want to say if you choose that it's not likely it won't be there. You'll be able to do some of the things that frankly choosing CFS, then good luck. That was her opinion. And I really appreciate her for that because if you love what you're doing, even if it's difficult, then this is where the magic comes. And yesterday because I wasn't feeling too great. I still managed to do what I said I was going to do that to me is integrity. And I want to be integrity with myself is that something if you want to be Integrity with your work to do what you say you're going to do regardless and feel. So the fourth simple way is to love what you do to love. Whatever it is that you have right now in your life. Just tell me one thing, one thing that if you stopped doing that thing, whatever that thing was that the single biggest impact in your life. There's one thing if you stopped doing but not just for a day, maybe start off by doing it for a density what's different? What if you stopped doing it for an extended period of time? What difference does it make stop procrastinating and maybe be more specific stop procrastinating about exercising. Stop making excuses about making those extra phone calls to grow your business. Stop ruminating about telling the people that you that you love that you love. What's the one thing that you stopped doing would have the biggest single impact in your life. And that's one thing if you started to do it, your life would change. And this is where I think the magic is the biggest one of the most wonderful feelings that human beings experience is the feeling of growth. It's just the feeling of compounding something over time. I can't give you the feeling of having done yoga for 50 days, every single day regardless of how you felt but I promise you if you had that feeling right now, but haven't done it, you'd think well I'm gonna do it. And if you picked up the phone from your future self you actually picked up the phone and realize that if you yourself, it's actually telling you it's actually telling you if you could see you could go into the future and then look back to where you are right now. You realize haven't got it. Right. You know where you got it. What you did daily, you know, if you love the process, if you love the carving act, if you love making progress and seeing your progress as you apply this most incredible the law of the universe, which is the law of compounding and aggregating over time. It's not for everyone and the hardest thing for most people is just to get started. That's the hardest thing. What Why is it so hard to get started? Why is it hard to get up off the chair and start moving around? Why is it hard to tell someone you love them? Why is it hard to pick up a pen and start writing? Why? Why is it hard to turn off YouTube and read a book or whatever it is? Why is it hard? That's a great question, isn't it? It's hard because I believe that most of us just want to protect our current position versus just want to hold on to who we think we are. And that's a choice. And that's the thing, right? Whenever the trees outside they have a choice of how they grow. That's what Jim Rohn used to speak about the dignity of choice. And most human beings are incredibly predictable. And I'm asking you with what we're about to face as a world we become because the fifth simple way is to go public. go public. I did go up you don't have to go public. But tell the world who you're committed to be tell people I promise you if you do it a lot of people wouldn't be like you're really weird. They might be threatened by that actually. What's wrong with me? As in Why do you want change? But I promise you if you put yourself into an environment that supports your growth, anything is possible. And we know that we know the power of community. And I'm really fortunate that I've got an amazing community of people around me who I love and support as I continue to do this work to help people see a future that they want to go out and create. If you don't see a future that you want to go out and create what will you do? You'll recreate it how's that worked out for you? That's why often people need someone just to literally just say, Hey, can we just stop it right now just never stop and look at it's sometimes really uncomfortable. I coach for 16 years of my life. He's from the Philippines. He was eight of 16 brothers and sisters. He lived in Dallas, and I traveled the world with him. And it was challenging because he had a different way of looking at the world. And he always used to actually say be me figure out where you are right now.
As the people that started Alcoholics Anonymous and Alcoholics Anonymous is still the number one behavioral change model in the world. And it saved a lot of people's lives.
Pete Cohen 20:18
I just like the idea of people finding the power within themselves to see a future that they go you know what? I see who I can be. I don't want to be that person. And I'm committed to being that person. If you don't see something about it the way you are right now is very topical. And this is why I'll finish this off. This is when we when we talk about how the science of how all the signs of hope is hope. It's just three elements to hope. You see a future that is better than your current circumstances. Even if where you are right now is great. You still see something better that you want to create. But what's even more exciting is you see a better version of you. You think I want to be that person. I want to become that person. I want to do that. Not that it's simple things are done every single day overtime. It's those private victories is what you're doing when no one else is watching. If you can record it, you can start to see strengths being built up and you can start to see something evolving because of the results of what you did over time. It's like the beautiful garden out there. The natural state of that God, Mr. K, the natural state of life is death. And that's what's going to happen. But before that we've still got an opportunity to live to live. But what is life? Well, for me, life is the space in between. And what's the greatest thing we can do with that space? Well, again, that's up to you. So let's just do a quick recap five simple ways to a better life. The first investor starts with the truth is that the webinar, let's face the fact that we know that we're going through some very difficult times I think it's really really difficult, really, really difficult and not more difficult for some people than others. And we can help those people I believe by making a decision that we have the opportunity to practice renewal we can renew ourselves every day. First way is just stop look at where you are judged or criticized that change there's no point doing that. Where are you out? Where are you with your health, your energy, your relationships are wealthy work, just look at the gaps, because it's not the point of life to sit in the gaps rather than being stuck in a gap which is called mediocrity, which means stuck in the middle of a rugged mountain, rather than let's start in the second way is to build a compelling relationship to your future self build empathy. So you really do this the day this is where we'll certainly tomorrow. The third is to sinful ways to commit commit to daily daily operation tiny habits. Tony Robbins say massive action. Personally, I think massive action is overrated because you can take massive action every day. I can understand you can take it to get some momentum. I'd say it's a massive vision, or a big bold vision. Of you need to be human being that those are what you create. But then I'd say it's the tiny, tiny steps to tiny steps, tiny things that 1% investments or 14 minutes and 24 seconds and the fourth is to love the fourth is to love and that's a challenge to love it. Love it when you don't feel like it. I didn't feel like having a cold shower this morning. But do I feel better for it? Absolutely.
I love the progress that's recording the progress. And I love the process. The fifth way is to just to go public, you know, put
Pete Cohen 22:35
your hand up. And to say this is this is what I'm compelled to do. And it might not work out. But if you go public that's where the magic is. That's what abracadabra means I create is I speak speaking your truth and speaking the commitment of who you are going to become don't expect it to be easy. Expect it to be challenging. I would say if you expect it to be easy, and it's not then guess what? It's just too easy. It's too easy to give up. And we've been sold this life of just ease. And I don't know about you, but I'm ready. The question is,
Pete Cohen 23:01
are you ready? Because if we really think about why we're here what we're doing here on this earth, I'd say we were I think you are born to be something but you reckon
Pete Cohen 23:10
it doesn't mean there's got to be a circle I used to be an aerobics instructor. I want to thank you for listening to the Future Self Podcast.
Pete Cohen 23:29
What's been your biggest takeaway? Have a wonderful, wonderful day. And we'll see you next time on the Future Self Podcast.